I Know The Plans I Have For You!

“The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me” Psalm 138:8

This week has been my last working week here in South Africa; it’s been good, a little harder than usual. I’ve been dreading writing this blog because I knew it’ll be my last one to add to my ‘South Africa’ collection and I knew I wouldn’t be writing another blog whilst being in South Africa which makes me really sad. But my mum has been encouraging me to carry on writing a blog when I get back to England so maybe I will, but I don’t think it will be anywhere near as exciting!

In the Links Office this week I have been preparing for a presentation I will be doing at Connections church on Sunday 29th. Although James (The Links project co-ordinator) gave me a subject which is I still didn’t know exactly what to write or say but he’s been helping me with it and I think I have it sorted. I’m a bit worried not about speaking in front of the church just that what I will be speaking about won’t make sense but later on I will be performing my presentation for James so hopefully we will see if things make sense or not.
I never thought I’d find myself enjoying being in an office this much, although I get a numb bum and my back aches sometimes it has been so worth it! I have learnt so much more than I thought I would. Granddad and James have been a big part in my learning, they have taught me a lot even from me just spending time with them and I hope they agree that it has been fun; we have had a lot of laughs. They are memories and lessons I will hopefully remember forever.

On Sunday I had the chance to go to a different church with Nan and Granddad. Granddad had spoke their on the Saturday at a conference that the church led and they invited me to tag along with them on the Sunday. The church is called Rock Covenant which is in Strand about an hour away and mostly Cape Coloureds go. When I got there I knew it was going to be good, everyone just had so much energy and there was a great atmosphere. Then the worship began and it was amazing, it sounded lovely, was energetic and they all started dancing, randomly where they were seated and then a group of ladies came to the front with their flowing skirts, tambourines and ribbons and performed a simple routine round in a circle which just looked so beautiful, it was fascinating! It brought me such joy! It was the best worship I’ve experienced for a few months, I just thought to myself that all churches should be like this, they should sing joyful energetic songs that make them happy because church should be a time to celebrate God and really let loose in his presence.

Then my last working week began and I realised I had 2 weeks till I was going back to England. Since Monday I’ve been thinking about it a lot, in the evenings or when I’ve been alone and it dawns on me even more and makes me feel low. Since a few years back I’ve found it really hard and challenging coming back from places, even just 2 week holidays I hate it, it makes me anxious and I absolutely dread it. It’s a horrible feeling, the last week before you’re going back to your home, you’re battling between loving being in a place you love that at the time is your home and then leaving the place you love and going back to your ‘so called’ home but to see family and friends that are missing you. It’s hard enjoying your LAST week somewhere that you love.

"And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his life?” Matthew 6:27

I’ve also been thinking about my future, wondering what’s going to happen when I get back, if things will plan out how I think they will or what!? I’m planning on getting back, applying for Job Seekers Allowance and until I get a job I’m just going to be out everyday giving out CV’s, ringing and emailing people, hoping and praying that I will soon enough get a job. But it doesn’t sound very exciting does it!? I don’t think it so...
I was hoping while I was here I’d figure out what I want in my future, what I desire and what road God wants me to take, but I still don’t know. Some people love the thought of not knowing what their future holds, I’m quite laid back but for some reason that thought scares the life out of me!  

 A lot of the youth I have met here have great jobs in the areas they love and I’ve been struggling with thinking that I will never have a job I enjoy, I will never have a job as good as them. And then I realise that their jobs aren’t for me, they are for them. They are doing what they are good at, using their gifts and my gift is something different, my gift is for me, it’s something I enjoy and it’s what God has put in my heart and it takes me to Romans 12:6...

“Let’s just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without enviously or pridefully comparing                                              ourselves with each other or trying to be something we aren’t”. 

I’ve prayed so much this week and spent so much time speaking to God about everything that is on my mind, I’m still struggling with these feelings a little but now and then I’m reminded that everything WILL be okay, that God has amazing plans for me, he has something so perfect that will satisfy my heart, that isn’t made for anyone else but just for me...

And I’m going back to home to an amazing family that are waiting for me...

How amazing is that!? What more could you want!?

“Let everyone be sure that he is doing his very best, for then he will have the personal satisfaction of work well done, and won't need to compare himself with someone else.” Galatians 6:4

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

I’ve also got an amazing week lined up, I’m going out tonight with some friends tonight for probably my last South African clubbing experience, sad times! Then on Monday I am going away for a few days with Nan and Granddad. We will be driving to the North East of South Africa to go on Safari and to a place called Montague Springs which I am really excited about!!!

Then I am having a Braai (which means Bbq) at my house, with some friends as a final Goodbye.

All work, No play?

I don't think so...This is what happens when you have too much time on your hands...

Yes! Camel riding is as fun as it looks!

Break my heart for what breaks yours!

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” 
John 16:33

It’s been a short but good week; Monday was a public holiday so we’ve all had a really long relaxing weekend which was lovely!

On Tuesday we got back in the office and back to work. I’ve been working on articles this week to add to our ‘Being A Volunteer’ series, it’s actually been hard as my last few haven’t been very good and I didn’t know exactly what to write. It’s a shame because they were my last ones but I’m still happy because I’ve learnt a lot from writing them. I’ve also been preparing for a presentation that I will be doing on my last Sunday at Connections church; it will be about serving and my experience volunteering for Links. It’s all very nerve racking but I’m actually looking forward to it. I get nervous speaking in front of people especially church’s but I do really enjoy it as the same time, I always feel really proud of myself after and feel as though I have achieved something.

This is my second from last blog post and I’ve thinking about my blogs a lot as I’ve really been hoping that my last few ones are really good, I think I’ve been thinking a little too much and blocking out what God wants to talk to me about but in the end it does always get through and I’ve found it really exciting waiting on God and blogging about what he wants me to say.

Today I got a little too excited about blogging and had so many things I wanted to write about and I started writing loads in my diary but I realised if I wrote everything  then it would be a bit of a mess.

When you have really close friendships/relationships do you ever find yourself feeling down when they’re down and rejoicing when they are?

I do. I find it particularly hard to be happy when I know my family or best friends aren’t. When I feel like this I know that’s when my heart is involved, when I’m emotionally attached and when I really care and love them.  Recently when I’ve read the bible or blogs, stories and articles about God or about what God is doing I’ve found myself getting very choked up. Especially when I’ve read stories about when God has been or felt heartbroken, I just can’t imagine how he feels.

“Show me how to love like You have loved me, Break my heart for what breaks Yours, Everything I am for Your Kingdom's cause, As I walk from earth into eternity” 
(Hillsong United – Hosanna)

Have you ever cried over your best friends or sister’s hurt, pain and heartbreak? It’s like that.

Now I know that I really do truly care about God and that I don’t want to break his heart anymore. He’s my best friend, my sister, my everything. He has caught my heart and I’m now so attached.

I think it’s amazing that even though you can’t see God you can have a relationship with him that feels more real than anything earthly. Your missing out if you haven’t experienced it.

"Eternal life is to know you, the only true God, and to know Jesus Christ, the one you sent”
John 17:3

“Because you have seen me, you have believed...

Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”

 John 20:29

I’ve had such a good week, I haven’t done anything majorly exciting but I’ve realised I’ve been feeling so peaceful. Over the past 2 months I’ve been praying for peace and It’s finally here and the timing is perfect. I’ll be leaving South Africa in 2 and a half weeks and I’ve been dreading it but all I feel now is peace, It’s wonderful!                                                                                                                            


As I was writing this blog this song came on – Celine Dion-Alive  
It’s a beautiful song, it gives me peace.

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. 

Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid” 

John 14:27

A Kiss from God

This week I have been asked to write my blog early. I normally write it on Fridays but seeing as Friday is a public holiday, I needed to get started early.

There’s not much to say about work / volunteering as my week has only just began. Overall, though, it’s still going really well, I’m still enjoying serving Links, Connections and God.

I was in the Links office yesterday as Ham, the Connections church leader, didn’t need me at his office. I used the opportunity to pull all my website review results together and finished a further article in the ‘Being A Volunteer’ blog series http://www.linksinternationalsa.com/category/being-a-volunteer-resource
I was a bit worried about writing my blog today because I didn’t think I’d have much to write about as it’s only Tuesday.  So what I did was spend most of this morning thinking, praying, listening to my favourite Christian songs and… God spoke to me about a lot of things!

This week I’ve been spending a lot of personal time with God.  If you read my last blog post, you will know I was challenged by my older sister to spend more personal time with God. Taking her advice, I’ve been going for long walks along the beach recently.

When I went for a walk yesterday I pretended God was beside me, walking with me. But then I realised there was no need to pretend because he is always right there, walking beside me.                                How amazing!

I started wondering ‘How can people doubt you?’ but realised that I’ve spent most of my life doubting God up until now. As I’ve fallen more and more in love with God I’ve found myself doubting him less and less. I think it’s just like falling in love with any human, the more you fall in love with them the more you forget about the bad and you grow in hope and faith.

“Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side.                                    Stop doubting and believe.” John 20:27

As a young woman, I desire to fall in love – just like most women do. I think falling in love with God is an important part of your relationship with Him, because it’s a desire God places in a women’s heart. He wants us to fall in love with him and He loves us falling in love with Him.

 Women admire beauty. As a result of God, who knows this, showing me His beauty I have fallen so in love with him. I love waking up to this wonderful country, surrounded by sunshine, sea, flowers and beautiful mountains and it was all created by Him. I am just in awe!

I’ve been reading a book since I have been here called Captivating – Unveiling the mystery of a Women’s Soul, which I would highly recommend! In one chapter Stasi – the author – spoke about a trip she and her husband went on and her husband snuck away for some time alone with God.  

 “… down to the beach where he walked and prayed and finally sat in the sand to watch the waves upon the sea. Then he saw it. A huge plume of water shot up into the sky, and a massive humpback whale appeared right before him, impossibly close to shore. No one else was near. The time of the whale’s annual migration had long passed. John knew immediately that this was a gift from God to his heart alone, a gift from the lover of his heart”. 

Stasi’s husband told her about what happened. She was happy for him but she wanted a kiss for herself. So when they went on another trip Stasi decided to take some time out to spend with God and she asked God for a whale as a gift.

“After a while, with no whale in sight, I got up and continued to walk. It was early spring, waves crashing, seagulls crying. The northern coast of California is rocky and as I picked my way through, I rounded a corner and came upon a starfish, a beautiful orange starfish. And I knew at once it was God’s gift to me, his kiss. He didn’t give me a whale; no, that was for John alone. For me, unique to me, he gave a stunning starfish. I thanked him for it, then rounded the next bend and came upon a sight I will never forget. There before me, behind me, surrounding me, were hundreds of starfish. Zillions of them. There were purple ones, orange ones and blue ones, all sizes. I burst into joyful laughter, my heart exploding inside me.”

While I was reading this I had tears running down my cheeks, just reading it and imagining it made me fall in love with God and like Stasi I wanted a kiss for myself. I didn’t know what it was going to be, or when I was going to get it but I knew I would eventually get one and I was prepared to wait.

My kiss came quite soon after I asked for one. Between the March 19th and 26th, we went on a ministry trip to Lower Gweru, Zimbabwe, to do some training with the local people. Lower Gweru isn’t in the bush but it is very close; it’s out of town, quiet and beautiful. One evening after I had brushed my teeth I decided to go outside quickly to see the dogs. I looked up at the sky and the stars were so bright they scared me. It took me a moment to realise what they were, I had never seen so many so brightly in my life. I'm telling you they were sososo amazing, I was in awe and so overwhelmed. I just kept giggling and like Stasi my heart just exploded and I knew that was my kiss from God to me!

 I was planning on going to bed but after that I was too restless (in a good way).

How could you not love such a beautiful God!?

“This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.” 1 John 4: 9-10 

2 Months down 1 to go...

Last week was a lot different to my usual week here…

The Links International SA team took a Ministry trip to Zimbabwe Lower Gweru, to do some Business Development, Healthcare and Geographical training. Geographical training time is when you speak about a particular geographical subject in particular nations and the subject we were asked to speak on in Zimbabwe was ‘The Bride of Christ’.

 I spent the last week serving in Zimbabwe which meant I wasn’t able to write any blogs or updates. So I’ll be updating you on my last two weeks in one go.

We arrived at our host’s house in Lower Gweru, Zimbabwe, on Monday 19th at 6.30pm. It wasn’t quite in the bush but close; and it wasn’t too basic, either. We went there to do some training and meet with the local business development team, AGAPE.

We stayed with a couple who very good friends with my Nan and Granddad, Sam and Anna Ndlovu. Sam is the Zimbabwean Apostolic overseer of a network called New Covenant Ministries International and Anna is part of the AGAPE Business Development team Links International SA founded in 2011.

When we arrived we found out that Sam had changed around our programme a little so we didn’t quite know how things were going to work out. When I’ve been on Ministry/Mission trips before we never seem to have much of a structure but it’s all part of the fun. I didn’t have a clue what I was going to be doing apart from being the photographer but throughout the week I made myself available and was given a few different tasks.

Andy, the Links International UK director, and his wife Lina came along on the trip with us. He got me involved in a few dramas he used as demonstrations in his teachings.

On Sunday I was given a difficult task: I was asked to help out with the kids in Sunday school which I was very happy to do. I spoke to the Sunday school teacher and asked her what she wanted me to do and what she normally does with the kids, she just said ‘We take them outside and play’. So I was prepared to help out and play a few games but then on Sunday morning she told me I was taking the kids aged 6 and over on my own. I was a bit surprised and a little scared but because I have been involved in Sunday school before I knew a few bible stories I could teach so in the end everything went really well. I told them the story of the Prodigal Son and asked them to create their own drama. The kids seemed to love it and so did I! Another challenge overcome!

It was good being in Zimbabwe but I was so happy to be home. It’s a good experience; you really do appreciate what you have when you’ve spent some time living somewhere a lot more basic than you normally live. It’s hard because we often forget but we should always remind ourselves and give thanks to God for what we do have.

We arrived back home in South Africa on Monday 26th 3.45pm. We started our week on Tuesday as usual, working in the Links SA office. Since then I’ve written a report on our time in Zimbabwe, I’ve finished my website review and I have been getting together the stats from the results of the Survey Monkey questionnaire. I am now preparing to write a full summary of all the results. It’s been a tiring week, recovering from all the travelling but it’s been good getting back into the office.

2 months down, 1 month left and it seems like time is really starting to fly by.

This week I feel like God is telling me to stop worrying and just enjoy my time here with him. I’ve been told by 2 people that I need to stop worrying about other people, stop carrying other people’s burdens and enjoy the time I have left because after all this trip is about me and God. I didn’t realise how much I was worrying and how much it was affecting how I was feeling until they pointed this out to me. I feel like I could be enjoying myself a lot more than I already am and I want to make the most of my time and my experience and really get stuck in but worrying has become a barrier and a hindrance.  My sister spoke to me and she’s been encouraging me to find an activity or a private time where I can spend time with God.

She said ‘Its key to your relationship with God. When no-one else is there, he is, you have to get used to going to him and talking with him’.

 I realised I wasn’t spending as much personal  time with him as I could be and that I needed to because of how I was feeling.

He wants us to spend time with him.

It’s amazing that he is always with us and carries our burdens; we should really take advantage of it and spend as much time with him as possible!

‘The Lord said ‘Come with me by yourselves to a quite place and get some rest’. Mark 6v31

‘Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest, take my yoke upon you for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for you souls’. Matt 11v28-29

Yesterday it started raining a lot here and I love South African rain, it’s not cold, it’s amazing, I don’t know why but I love it. So I decided to take a long walk in the rain and ended up walking down to the sea front and taking a walk along the beach, even though it was raining it was still so beautiful! Most of the time I was walking I was chatting away to God about everything, asking for help, repenting, thanking and praising him. When I got home I felt so relieved and refreshed and I was proud of myself because I’m not good at praying and that was probably the longest time I’ve ever prayed and it made me excited to keep praying.

‘The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters and he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.’ Psalm 23

Check out more photos on my Facebook (The Camels were so lovely)

In my spare time this week I have been sunbathing, watching films and on Thursday Nan and Granddad took me to Imhoff Farm to take a camel ride! I was so excited and it was so much fun – the camels were beautiful! The ride was only short which was a shame but it was lovely and a great experience, I’m definitely going to be doing it again one day! I’m also looking forward to the weekend, tonight I'm going with some friends to Club 31, which is a club in Cape Town SO EXCITED. I need to make the most of the next few weeks and I also need to top up my tan a bit more :P

Faith as small as a mustard seed

I now have just over 6 weeks left, time is going fast!

Volunteering and working this week has been good, it’s gone very fast, in a good way. I’ve been doing the usual, worked with Ham on Monday which was a short day because we didn’t have much to do so I helped in the kitchen again with making chocolates then for the rest of the day I looked after their son Zac.

On Tuesday I only had half a day in the office as I went to Happy Valley with my Nan (Beryl). It is a home where homeless people stay while they try and get back on their feet and look for jobs. A few people from church go there every few months to talk, encourage and pray with the ladies and normally bring them food. This time it was Nanny’s turn so I tagged along just to see what it was like and it was heartbreaking. We went into one of the ladies dorms, where it had about 10 beds in one room, it was dirty and smelly. Most of the ladies I saw looked down and out, it was like as you walked in you could feel it. I was surprised though that some of the ladies had their bibles ready, it still amazes how people who don’t have a home or job and are really down still have their bibles and still have some faith in God, I’d like to think I would be the same. At the end they seemed so pleased and Thankful, it was heart warming. (You can see pictures on Facebook)

‘The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit’ Psalm 34: 17-18

I’ve also finally started to review the Links International website which I have been preparing for awhile now. I thought it was going to be hard but it’s been fine so far and I’m nearly finished.

Me, Nan and Granddad are also preparing for our trip to Zimbabwe, we leave on Monday VERY early in the morning and I’m really excited! We’re going to Lower Gweru to stay with a family who are friends of Connections church leader Ham. It will be out of the town nearer the bush and apparently they have a lot of animals like goats, chickens and rabbits, I love those sorts of environments! It’ll be a lot different to Nan and Granddads house but I don’t mind, I’ve been out in the bush in Uganda and it was a great experience so I’m sure this will be too. Nan and Granddad are going to be doing some teaching and we don’t know yet what I will do, hopefully there will be something but I’m laid back, I said I can just play with the kids and be the photographer.

I’ve never felt God so powerful before, I’m still so overwhelmed and this week God has put the broken hearted on my heart. There’s so much hurt and pain in the world we live in and a lot of the time people say ‘Where was God!?’ and then they lose faith. I’ve been praying for them that God will show himself to them the way he has been showing himself to me.

I have been in the same situation and I ended up being angry with God asking him why he let me get in the situation. In the end I realised a lot of it was my own fault. It’s easy to blame God, push him away and to forget about him in our troubles, I made matters worse by doing so.

The truth is God is always there, he never leaves us because he is a loyal and faithful God.

‘When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered, I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you. Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand’ Psalm 73: 21-23

I wrote a blog a few weeks ago called ‘Sow in tears, Reap in joy’, it relates a lot to this blog. Sow in tears for me means; working for God and praying to God in our pain and hurt. Reap in joy for me means; we will succeed and grow in joy.

I’ve sown in tears and in the end I reaped in joy. God always pulls through if you let him and ask him to. He is the most POWERFUL, loyal, LOVING thing living and anything is possible through God!

‘For I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed you can say to this mountain move from here to there and it will move! Nothing will be impossible for you!’ Matthew 17:20

(I cannot wait for the day when)          

‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Revelations 21:3-4

The Sound Of Heaven Touching Earth!

I cant explain how much i'm loving this song right now...

It is such a simple song, with not a lot of lyrics but it's so powerful! I've listened to it about 10 times over the past day and half thanks to my sister Nicola sending it to me and I just can't get enough!

It gives me goose bumps, it makes me feel happy, free, loved and it makes me cry every time, it makes me so excited to worship and praise, it's making me crave a mad worship session
So many different feelings!

I really do feel the Holy Spirit every time I listen to, its like a glimpse of heaven...

I'd encourage you to listen to if you haven't, put it on loud in your room on your own and just sit and listen to it, you'll feel how powerful it is straight away...

Spirit break out, break our walls down. 

Spirit break out, Heaven come down. (x2) 

Our Father, all of Heaven roars Your name. 

Sing louder, let this place erupt with praise. 

Can you hear it? The sound of Heaven touching earth. 

The sound of Heaven touching earth. (x2) 

And Jesus, would You shine and let the Father's glory fill this land of mine. Blaze, Spirit, blaze. And set our hearts on fire 'til we roar your praise. And flow, river flow now. Let the Spirit break out to break our walls down. And Heaven come down, Heaven come down, Heaven come down. Spirit break out. 

Spirit break out, break our walls down. 

Spirit break out, Heaven come down. 

King Jesus, You're the name we're lifting high. 

Your glory shaking up the earth and skies. 

Revival - we want to see Your kingdom here. 

We want to see Your kingdom here. 

Spirit break out, break our walls down. 

Spirit break out, Heaven come down.

My favourite line is 'The sound of heaven touching earth' !!!